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* * *
In my mid-30s, after rebelling against my childhood religious sect ~ and rebellion is an ego-ploy, a reactivity ~, I was surprised by another clergyperson, Ralph. He was raised in the same religious sect as I. Ralph, some male friends, and I would meet weekly in a room of the church Ralph served as pastor. In what I recall as my first or second meeting with this group, he said to me before the others, "Brian, you are caught in counter-fundamentlism." He said he had been, also, after leaving the religious group. What I had done, he pointed out, was become as strictly against fundamentalist Christianity as the strictness it had socialized me into. So, he clarified, I was as fundamentalist as the fundamentalists, even in my apparent rejection of that fundamentalism. He was right, and I could see it clearly. I began to work with releasing the judgmental thoughts, inviting a true inclusiveness I had not known in the reactivity, a seeing beyond for or against. I was thankful for Buddhism being instrumental in helping in the softening of this reactivity, though I never officially became Buddhist. I, rather, continued serving as a clergyperson in a more inclusive Christian sect than that of my younger years. Love, see, integrates opposites in a more whole synthesis, all opposites being factional, Love being Wholeness.
* * *
We are socialized based on an ego, whether individual or group, that defines itself for and against. So, if one is for a group and against another, when he or she becomes for the one previously against, then against the previously one for comes into play. This is simply the nature of how the ego behaves to protect its sense of individuality and need to feel security in itself and in its group, the group being only an extension of itself. And this is not merely a matter of religion, this is part of the fabric of human society, including family, politics, education, religion, spirituality, race, nationality, ... I see this to be a reason Jesus is attributed, in the Christian Gospels, with saying, "You're in the world, however, not of the world." The world is a system of made of preferential systems, often competing, and these systems appeal to biases, embodying a propaganda of subtraction from Wholeness, from Love. Advertising has become a deceitful skill to obtain "converts" to worship a product, rather than means to speak truth. I was even trained in college and seminary to "sell" the product "Jesus," and this meant speaking forth a message that judged all non-Christians as doomed, as damned. Now, I see that, too, is part of the world system, part of the untruth that leads from the beauty and grace, yes Love, of Wholeness. Thankfully, we can be totally wrong in our attempt to love and with the sincere intent of Love, later to see the error of how we sought to express that Love. We, then, can see more clearly Grace present even amid the foilables of our attempts to be graceful. Through this seeing, we can become more gracious to others who sincerely are mis-expressing the kindness of Love.
* * *
All prejudice, all lack of inclusiveness, is based on ego, and ego is based on thought, and thought is based on memory. Simply put, the prejudices endemic to our societies and groups are so pervasive, most of these prejudices are not even recognized. And most persons do not realize what we think is simply that, what we think. That is, truly, we are not thinking creatively at all, we are simply processing automatically what we have already been informed is true and false. Even when claiming freedom of thought, mostly that is simply freedom to choose among ideas as I choose, not to choose to think itself. Thinking freely requires an unbiased openness, one few humans seem to be prepared to invite into their lives.
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